You can't make this up

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Author Message David J. Wyatt, CDT Senior Member Username: david_j_wyatt_cdt Post Number: 77 Registered: 03-2011 Posted on Thursday, May 08, 2014 - 08:47 am:    I discovered this today in a master guide specification for a public school system: "Items listed with no substitute manufacturers have been requested by Owner/Architect to match existing for continuity and/or future performance and maintenance standards or, because the owner just wants it that way." I laughed so hard I almost had an accident. Ellis C. Whitby, PE, CSI, AIA, LEED® AP Senior Member Username: ecwhitby Post Number: 219 Registered: 03-2003 Posted on Thursday, May 08, 2014 - 09:08 am:    Any idea who wrote that? Maybe a specifcation writer was tired of asking for and not getting clear direction,and wrote what they saw as "the facts"? It certainly reflects reality in all too many cases. Dave Metzger Senior Member Username: davemetzger Post Number: 512 Registered: 07-2001 Posted on Thursday, May 08, 2014 - 09:18 am:    Love it. It's like telling your children, ...."because I said so." Lynn Javoroski FCSI CCS LEED® AP SCIP Affiliate Senior Member Username: lynn_javoroski Post Number: 1799 Registered: 07-2002 Posted on Thursday, May 08, 2014 - 09:40 am:    And sometimes there is no other way to express that. Either the explanation is too complicated, too lost in history, or too indefinite to explain. So we resort to a verbal stamp of the foot and a royal declaration of "I want what I want when I want it". All too human. J. Peter Jordan Senior Member Username: jpjordan Post Number: 724 Registered: 05-2004 Posted on Thursday, May 08, 2014 - 11:47 am:    I am sure that the procurement office for the district would have a cow if he/she saw this. Wayne Yancey Senior Member Username: wayne_yancey Post Number: 651 Registered: 01-2008 Posted on Thursday, May 08, 2014 - 11:51 am:    Peter, You are assuming someone actually reads stuff other than the special reader at the GC's office looking (with a fine tooth comb) for potential errors, omissions, contradictions, the bad and the ugly. Anything with a potential $ sign. Chris Grimm, CSI, CCS, SCIP, LEED AP BD+C, MAI Senior Member Username: chris_grimm_ccs_scip Post Number: 254 Registered: 02-2014 Posted on Monday, May 12, 2014 - 12:24 pm:    Even when I specifically asked them to look for questions in the masonry spec that needed their attention, an owner-hired program manager tasked with reviewing all the documents failed to see an obvious April Fools spec I put in cold weather procedures that when the date of the documents is April 1 (it was for the draft specs) to provide chili in accordance with ICS Rules and Regulations, at project meetings when the temperature is below 25 deg F, with bracketed options for how often. And I was going to say to whoever caught it "you win the prize! let's go to the new chili bowl location, my treat." Maybe some other time...lol. Sheldon Wolfe Senior Member Username: sheldon_wolfe Post Number: 758 Registered: 01-2003 Posted on Monday, May 12, 2014 - 12:30 pm:    While most of us appreciate the humor in hidden gags, if I were an owner I'd be asking why I'm paying people to screw around. Several years ago, one of our principals discovered something like this in a document that was going to the owner for review. The specific item could well have meant termination of our contract and no further work from that client. Chris Grimm, CSI, CCS, SCIP, LEED AP BD+C, MAI Senior Member Username: chris_grimm_ccs_scip Post Number: 256 Registered: 02-2014 Posted on Monday, May 12, 2014 - 12:53 pm:    This was a project where I already had a close relationship with the client. If it became an issue I would have hoped they would be more concerned about what their program manager was not doing, since it was in a draft not for anyone's review except design team, owner, and program manager and worded to remain so. I agree there are risks with this sort of thing, clearly not for use in a context where it could cause any problems. Occasionally it is possible to inject a little fun into what we do without adding risk, or even reducing risk by pointing out adequate review is not happening and ask the right people about it. There are risks in getting out of bed in the morning. Or being in bed too much can kill you. George A. Everding, AIA, CSI, CCS, CCCA Senior Member Username: geverding Post Number: 741 Registered: 11-2004 Posted on Monday, May 12, 2014 - 01:59 pm:    Actually, there is an ASTM standard for the hotness of chile peppers - somewhere I have a copy. I used it to illustrate reference standards to my class at the community college - much more fun than building materials. The hottest peppers are rated over 1,000,000 Scoville units (whatever that means), and a bell pepper is zero. We never did a taste test in class, however. George A. Everding AIA CSI CCS CCCA Allegion PLC (formerly Ingersoll Rand) St. Louis, MO Chris Grimm, CSI, CCS, SCIP, LEED AP BD+C, MAI Senior Member Username: chris_grimm_ccs_scip Post Number: 257 Registered: 02-2014 Posted on Monday, May 12, 2014 - 03:06 pm:    George, I think this must be it - phenomenal idea! http://www.astm.org/Standards/E1083.htm Next time such an opportunity presents itself, I will have to put in a boxed yellow project note asking how many Scoville units per that ASTM they want for the chili, with bracketed options for that. Ellis C. Whitby, PE, CSI, AIA, LEED® AP Senior Member Username: ecwhitby Post Number: 222 Registered: 03-2003 Posted on Monday, May 12, 2014 - 03:09 pm:    George; http://www.chilliworld.com/factfile/scoville_scale.asp Try the Naga-Bih Jolokia pepper: I have never had the nerve to try more than the Scotch Bonnet (Habanero). Which makes a pretty good base for chili. Helaine K. Robinson CSI CCS CCCA SCIP Senior Member Username: hollyrob Post Number: 396 Registered: 07-2003 Posted on Monday, May 12, 2014 - 03:14 pm:    For your peeved owner: How to Trick the Guilty and Gullible into Revealing Themselves It starts with a basic understanding of game theory and incentives By STEVEN D. LEVITT and STEPHEN J. DUBNER May 9, 2014 8:07 p.m. ET http://online.wsj.com/articles/how-to-trick-the-guilty-and-gullible-into-revealing-themselves-1399680248?KEYWORDS=dubner "As clever as that was, David Lee Roth may have been a bit cleverer—according, at least, to Mr. Roth himself. Here is how he tells the story in a Vimeo video. By the early 1980s, Van Halen had become one of the biggest rock bands in history. Their touring contract carried a 53-page rider that laid out technical and security specs as well as food and beverage requirements. The "Munchies" section demanded potato chips, nuts, pretzels and "M&M's (WARNING: ABSOLUTELY NO BROWN ONES)." When the M&M clause found its way into the press, it seemed like a typical case of rock-star excess, of the band "being abusive of others simply because we could," Mr. Roth said. But, he explained, "the reality is quite different." Van Halen's live show boasted a colossal stage, booming audio and spectacular lighting. All this required a great deal of structural support, electrical power and the like. Thus the 53-page rider, which gave point-by-point instructions to ensure that no one got killed by a collapsing stage or a short-circuiting light tower. But how could Van Halen be sure that the local promoter in each city had read the whole thing and done everything properly? Cue the brown M&M's. As Roth tells it, he would immediately go backstage to check out the bowl of M&M's. If he saw brown ones, he knew the promoter hadn't read the rider carefully—and that "we had to do a serious line check" to make sure that the more important details hadn't been botched either. And so it was that David Lee Roth and King Solomon both engaged in a fruitful bit of game theory—which, narrowly defined, is the art of beating your opponent by anticipating his next move."